For the second time this early morning Charlotte got into her car and was about to start when a great light shone
down on us from heaven and a very musical chime sounded over the still sleeping world.
Lucky world! By then I wished sincerely
I was well in bed and sleeping too ...
"Now what!" Dina mumbled behind me "More - real angels?" Lulu mused. But Johnny
said "No it - its a spa-spaceship, girls - look!"
And right he was. It was a beautiful sleek space ship. Shaped much like a cigar and shining pink.
... I swear!
Tshee-hee *O*
It was a improbable girlish pink colour with little shimmering white lights running
the length of it. And there was no engine noise at all. Only a tingling sound like a great big wind chime ringing in a gentle
breeze.
In a moment it touched ground with a mere sigh in the road and a big hatch opened up in front of us letting out
women, Lots of women.
O.K. ...
One woman was almost as round as a ball with bright yellow skin and red hair. Another
had four arms with so many bangles on she wouldn't be able to sneak up on a deaf man in the middle of a rock concert when
the sound is at its loudest. A third was so long and thin she could perhaps look in through the second floor windows in a
normal house and then slide under a snake with out the reptile even noticing her.
And so on and so forth. All were different.
To
top that these women all started to yell and scream and point and jump up and down and clap their hands - or flippers
in one case - the moment they saw my poor scared little baby boy.
My hero immediately grabbed my arm and dragged me behind Lulu and Charlotte who had gotten out of the car again
which made Dina giggle "Easy, pet. They are just fans of yours, Johnny"
When everybody had quiet down a bit they presented
themselves with Charlotte as interpreter as members of the IUD * And the excited females thought they had now found the
superstar they were all fans of and would therefore very much like to present Mr. Depp with an award they had brought with
them.
"... if you would be so kind as to come forward, sir?" their spokesperson said in a bit surprised tone of voice.
And stop hiding behind Lulu and Charlotte, she meant *O*
"A-award?" Johnny said - stammered - looking
up at Charlotte. And she asked her fellow planet woman from Xracz what kind of reward it was.
So the women came up with a very handsome little pyramid made of crystal which caught the light of the raising
sun in a very beautiful fashion making a small rainbow there and then even though there had been no rain to tie a bow of.
We
all declared that that was the prettiest thing we had seen in a long time.
But my sweetie is an honest sweetie and by
now not so scared anymore so he asked Charlotte with a little sigh to please explain that they had also got the wrong Johnny.
And then whispered to me behind his hand "Could you go get the addresses for them too, please, baby girlie?"
But
before doing so I - for ever a curious chi - woman - asked Charlotte to find out why Johnny - either of them - was suppose
to get this award. And she obliged me by doing so.
Upon hearing the answer she laughed so hard though that she could hardly stand and had to have Lulu prop her
up which of course made us all ask what ever the answer had been.
Finally Charlotte wiped the tears from her eyes and said
with a very big smile "Oh, I am afraid Johnny Depp is going to hate this. Somewhat at least ... It seems that the women
in IUD have voted him the cutest and most romantic male ever in this whole big - humongous - Universe. Male because on
some planet there is no such thing as man and woman. Oh, I do want to go with them and see his face when he hears this!" she
giggled.
"Well, you just have to look at Meepsie's beau here beside us" Lulu smiled. And Johnny promptly stuck his tongue
out in her direction being ever so mature. Which just made her smile even broader.
But the dandelion yellow woman with the bright red hair suddenly gave a little squeal and said something in a
great hurry to the other women and then they all started to beamed at Johnny and clap their hands again.
"What did she
say?" Dina wanted to know.
Johnny mumbled "I could use a stiff drink round about now - where did the rum go?" and
I told him it was in the pantry as usual and hadn't gone anywhere unless he had drunk the last without telling me
Then Charlotte suddenly said "Wait a second, my darling boy! They have a award for you too!"
And so they had
and one for me too ...
It turned out these SILLY foreign - no, make that alien - females are fans of my stories ... amazing
... and as such of course also ardent fans of my invented cutie pie *o*
Who after all is the only really reason for loving this silly nonsense, after all - he *blush shyly
s*
What you'd know?
People might be reading this right now at 2706 Milky Way, Universal City, where Charlotte told me there
is a public library situated and where you can borrow a free computer for an hour.
Its hardly to be believed ...
And I am not saying you should either -o*
But these very friendly female
aliens gave my dear baby a little heart made of a ruby and hanging in a gold chain to wear around his beautiful neck.
Then they presented me - to my great embarrassment - with a miniature golden quill hanging in another gold chain.
They had brought these along they told us just in case Johnny Depp knew where Meeps and her Johnny lived - which he of
course doesn't! Hopefully he'll never even read this at all or I will blush more read than the little ruby
heart! He *o*
After we had thanked them many times and written a new note with the necessary addresses the happy women
flew off on their Johnny Depp-hunt with another tingling sound.
And Charlotte finally managed to leave too.
Laughing that she better be off before the Charmed Ones would show up and demand the magical Johnny helped them
slew demons and other supernatural bad guys.
He was after all both charming and charmed so he would fit right in. Perhaps as their long lost dear brother
or something.
When she had left Lulu sighed that perhaps Godzilla would want Johnny as father to her eggs and to help her
persuade Matthew Broderick and the American government that it was actually quite O.K. for her to start a family in New York
as so many other immigrants had after all ...
Johnny corrected her though with a wry smile "No, sweetie - haven't
you heard? Godzilla is a he - though of the egg producing and laying - variation ... A very rare phenomenon as far as
I know. Although the world would probably be a better place if the men had to give birth to at least every other child, as
Meeps has suggested before"
Where upon Dina giggled that maybe the Terminator - the new female one, that is - would
like Johnny better than old Arnie even though said Austrian-American big guy tried very hard to look cool wearing sunglasses
even at night in the third movie about that fairy tale.
That ideas made Johnny pretend he wanted to kick
her. Then when not having hit her behind at all he turned around to hug me and whisper "Could we go bed, please? Even though
it is morning by now, baby girlie"
And of course we could *o*
So now Lulu, Dina and Johnny for all I know are sleeping
soundly in their beds.
But I can't - sleep, that is. I can't help worrying whether more ferocious female - or males for
that matter - will come looking for this lovely man of mine for one reason or the other.
Wondering too if I should not after all find another guy to model him after than the smart, sexy and sweet Johnny
Depp - less trouble that way perhaps ...
But since I love my sweetie as he is I guess I just have to keep carrying
the Staff of Magius around as long as my dear mage friend Raistlin Majere will let me lend the magical piece of wood.
In order to be my Johnny's gorgeous-bodyguard *O*
That is unless he again gets it into his pretty little head
that he wants his freedom - from the worrying chicken here ...
And as this has shown there are pretty many people out there who wouldn't mind taking over being his beloved
and probably not caring one bit that he's not the real Johnny Depp, I am afraid. ... I can't help worrying. It comes
with the chicken feathers, I guess -o*
Hush though - I think I heard something?
.....
...
.
Oh *o* How sweet *O* That was my gentle, caring boy - worrying himself now. Asking
why I was not in bed sleeping in his arms - so maybe I better hang my chicken feathers in the closet and go join
him undercover in said soft piece of furniture.
Night, y'all *o*
* IUD: The Intergalatic Union of Deppites.
Founded and run by;
T. McGuffin,
313 Apple of Paradise Road,
Seventh District/north,
The Navle
